PyCXX does not offer a shared library,  it is intended users of this package
compile the sources into their extensions.
The Debian (and Fedora) package offers a pkg-config file named PyCXX.pc which
exports the installed location of the headers and sources required to build, do
not hardcode the path into your files.

Example:
Copy /usr/share/doc/python-cxx-dev/examples/ into a writeable area from there
you can compile an example by executing these commands:

CFLAGS="$(pkg-config --cflags PyCXX) $(python-config --cflags)"
SRC="$(pkg-config --variable=srcdir PyCXX)"

g++ -fPIC $CFLAGS simple.cxx \
    $SRC/cxxextensions.c $SRC/cxx_extensions.cxx \
    $SRC/cxxsupport.cxx \
    $SRC/IndirectPythonInterface.cxx \
    -shared -o simple.so
python test_simple.py